Pitchfork sucks (part 1 of what will be most likely many)

Sometimes I visit Pitchfork.com.  I don’t know why.  I know damn well I’m just going to get upset.

This month under Best New Music, they’ve featured Fuck Buttons’ new album Tarot Sport.  The reviewer on Pitchfork gave this album a 9.0 – now, for those of you unfamiliar with their rating system, this score will almost assuredly land Tarot Sport on the “Pitchfork’s Best of 2009” list… probably somewhere near the top.  A 9.0 rating means that for the next three months, this band will sell out every show in New York and LA (and consequently Chicago, San Francisco and probably Austin).

Just in case you were wondering what you were missing out on…

It’s two douchebags playing with Reason (poorly).  Could this stage show be more boring?  The entire album is composed of tracks with monotonous kick drum under fuzzy and not-so-fuzzy synths.  Minimal vocals.  Minimal melody.  I can’t tell if this is a joke or not.  I always half-suspected the men and women of Pitchfork were just a bunch of smug assholes trying to pull a prank on the world.  Case in point, Fuck Buttons.


2 Responses to “Pitchfork sucks (part 1 of what will be most likely many)”

  1. Fuck Buttons. They stole my name for my nipples!


    • Chris Heydt Says:

      I couldn’t agree more. A couple of malnourished hipsters noodling on keyboards and a laptop somehow qualifies as genius. I don’t get it. Nice blog, by the way.

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